The movie comes out on May 18, so my full review will have to wait till then. The American, pop-culture view of pregnancy and parenting is rife with stereotypes. We can see them within the trailers and the movie synopsis: We have the bumbling, clueless, often useless dad; a mom who has struggled to get pregnant dealing with the “oops, just happened to get pregnant” mom; busy (celebrity) mom finds pregnancy doesn’t fit her lifestyle; a mom who has all the complications and a miserable pregnancy; and a mom who is doing a global adoption.However, I’ve seen the trailers and seen a number of interviews with the movie stars. Quite honestly, I’m a bit concerned. I understand that the movie is intended as a comedy. Comedies have a tendency to exploit stereotypes.
We also see some other assumptions being made – 2nd trimester bounce back and sex drive “I just have all this extra energy. Plus I’m like crazy horny.” Too bad it doesn’t happen to everyone like that. Some women have morning sickness that lasts past the 1st trimester or other complications that don’t help fuel this feeling. Other women, even if they feel this way are nervous about having sex – or their partners are nervous about having sex, so it doesn’t happen. Individual experiences will vary.
An assumption that “I’m calling bull$#!%. Pregnancy sucks.” Except that it doesn’t suck for everyone. Some women have wonderful, easy pregnancies with little or no morning sickness, back pain, swollen feet or complications. Some women will have some symptoms and not others. Other women will have it all and feel like the quote above, hence my calling out the stereotype here. It’s not bull$#!% if a mom says she’s having a great pregnancy – guess what, she is. It’s also not bull$#!% if a woman says her pregnancy sucks – guess what, it does. We all have different experiences. All of our experiences are equally valid.
So, if sometimes the stereotypes are true does it make it wrong to portray them? Instead of pregnant, let’s substitute black, Jewish, gay, etc… If the stereotypes for religious and ethnic groups are socially unacceptable, then why are pregnancy and birth stereotypes OK? They aren’t. Any time we use stereotypes we marginalize a group of people. The “What to Expect” movie marginalizes pregnant women and their “bumbling” husbands.
I am tired of pregnant women being marginalized. I want better of pop-culture. I want better of our media. I want pregnancy and birth to be portrayed realistically, too bad most of the time it’s really quite boring and uneventful. Normal, physiologic birth just doesn’t make for good entertainment.
Speaking of marginalizing pregnant women and making them feel incompetent: my favorite pregnancy guru, Rosie Pope, was on the Today Show this morning hawking more baby products you must have – and promoting season 2 of her show, while being heavily pregnant with baby #3. (did you sense the sarcasm in my voice? I hope so…) I’ve written about her before. Simply awful.
So, I will pony up the money and go see this movie. Why? So you don’t have to. I intend to write a full and proper review of it for you, my readers. I am hoping that it fails to live up to my expectations and proves better than its trailers make it out. My confidence in this is low.
Sat Nam.
I agree – probably not going to be great….but – i have a glimmer of hope – the fantastic ladies from The Best for Babes Foundation (www.bestforbabes.org) were consultants on the movie – so I am hoping that they had some major impact (OK, a minor impact would be good too!)
Ah, I didn’t know they were consultants. That makes me a bit more optimistic . This is why I need to see the film before I fully pass judgement on it. Want to come with me? 🙂
Whatever REALISTIC, healthy message this movie may aspire to, it will totally get lost in all the Hollywood stereotype sh*t, and no one will remember the healthy message. Instead they will remember how clueless dads are supposed to be and how pregnancy is whatever the producers want you to believe it is. Deena, it seems like you would want producers to create honest work and be responsible for the IMPACT of the message. I wish that could happen; I hope it will in our lifetime.
If people wish to see a healthy portrayal of the childbearing woman they may have to go independent (not comedy), but it won’t be sensationalistic..and that is what sells. I know there are some movies that do this, but so few and far between. Maybe Deena could make a Top Ten list 🙂
As far as the book goes….arghhh. I read it with my first pregnancy. Sure, I knew what could go wrong with my body, the pregnancy, and childbirth. It did a great job and helping me stay focused on my fears. It gave me NO idea what labor could be like, no inkling of confidence in my body. Rather it serves to makes women reliant on medical professionals and the procedures they offer. I don’t believe in book burnings, but if I did this would be the first one on the fire. Given what I needed to know about my body and childbirth I consider this book to be garbage. Ya, that’s harsh, but I have other useful and enlightening birthing information to measure this book against.
I think it looks hilarious. Everything the dads said in the trailer was 100% applicable to our family.